Is talking too much really a fault?

Is talking too much really a fault?

Is talking too much really a fault?

Many people want to know how to make a good impression when they are talking to someone for the first time. To facilitate their task, researchers Quinn Hirschi, Timothy Wilson and Daniel Gilbert propose, in an article published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin and broadcast by The Conversation, an estimate of the speaking time that should be occupied to remain friendly.

Researchers call the belief that people think they are more pleasant when they are silent, “bias of reluctance.” However, nothing could be less true. In fact, as part of a study involving 116 participants, the experts organized meetings between several strangers who, on this occasion, kept their word for 30%, 40%, 50%, 60% or 70% of the time. conversation. And they found that those who talked the most were more likely to be liked by their interlocutors.

These results confirm those of a previous survey, in which researchers assigned one couple a role of speaker and another of listener. The study showed that after twelve minutes of conversation, the listeners seemed to have appreciated the speakers more than the opposite, and this because of a certain closeness that the latter would have created with their interlocutors by talking about them.

Talking more does not mean
dominate the conversation

According to scientists, it is also pointless to try to balance speaking times by wanting to appear both pleasant and interesting in the eyes of the person with whom you are speaking who, as a rule, only retains a general impression after an initial discussion. .

However, don’t try to dominate the conversation and crush the other’s word. In fact, as part of their work, the researchers asked people to speak “alone” only up to 70% of the time. But it is possible, and even probable, that taking up all the space in a conversation, for example speaking 90% of the time, is not an optimal strategy.

This study, however, does not reflect natural discussions in which people choose to be in the position of the speaker or listener. Future research should determine whether the findings can be applied to everyday interactions.

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